OMG! WTF? RBNY are going to MLS Cup after a 1-0 win in Salt Lake City.

Wow. I think I might throw up from glee. Thank you, Dave van den Bergh. Thank you, Danny Cepero. Thank you, multiple goalposts and RSL’s lack of finishing ability.

Wow.

According to a report at Soccer by Ives, Jon Conway has been suspended by MLS for 10 games for taking a banned substance. This news comes just about 48 hours before the final home game of the regular season, right at a time when the Red Bulls needed to win and control their own destiny. We could make the playoffs still…and I don’t have to watch Jon Conway playing in goal again.

Conway and Parke tested positive for androstatriendione (ATD) and boldenone metabolites, two banned performance enhancing substances. They will now miss the remainding two regular season matches and the playoffs, if the Red Bulls qualify.

The suspensions are the longest in MLS history.

Cepero…FTW!!!

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Oh and fuck you, Jon Conway. I won’t get started on Jeff Parke (who was also suspended) but this is what you get for having this touchhole pick up your “supplements”. Fuck you, Conway. You’re a joke and you needed to “gas” up for MLS? I hope to never see you in the league again.

Updated with new links!!! (more…)