Rookie Conor Chinn smiles on draft night. Last night, his two goals gave RBNY the 2-1 win over Philly. Also, Le Toux has dumb cleats. He’s “nationally ranked” (more…)

Well, it’s Friday, people. Tomorrow’s “Meet the Team” Day and we WON’T have to meet Jon Conway for the first time in years. In honor of that occasion, I found something great from our friends at The Sporting Blog: an ultra-rare “tandem” bicycle kick.

Sebastian Romero and Marco Perez activated their Wonder Twin powers to combine on what might be the first and only tandem bicycle kick goal in the history of the world. At least in actual competition. I can see it being staged in someone’s backyard. The two Gimnasia La Plata players had the serendipitous pairing of kicks after the ball deflected off a Boca Juniors defender in an Argentina Primera Division match last Sunday. [I Believe That's What Is Called a Tandem Bicycle Kick]

Yeah, that’s pretty awesome. The commercials that play AFTER the highlights are pretty great too. I learned how to move my body. Cool beans?

I have to say as a true Manchester United hater, this goal by Robben looks even cooler in Lego form. Ha. Take that.

Also, still hate Jon Conway. Just wanted to put that out there.

Evidently, the “Con-man” is in Toronto now. Can’t wait ’til he has to take goal kicks at Red Bull Arena

This guy’s life = better than yours, Jon Conway. Also, I know you’re mad and probably found your way into a suit of “Hans Backe” skin, but letting go of Danny Cepero like that was bogus. Oh well.

That being said, enjoy that rad clip of “world renowned freerunner Ryan Doyle” treating RBA as his own personal playground.

I won’t sit here and say that I haven’t lost my cool during a soccer match before (that would be a total lie), but there’s no excuse for this level of aggression. In this clip, Arlington Shirley of North West Rankin High (Ms) is just pummeled (and not in a good way at all) by Zach Windom of Gulfport High (Ms).

I feel bad for Zach’s teammates as they really were impacted by his bad choice and he should, really, be forced to the sidelines for the rest of the year. You just can’t do stuff like that, if you let it happen in sports under the guise of “aggression,” you’re sugar coating some serious anger issues. They’re right there to see.

Zach, man, you’re bigger than the kid, you’re probably stronger than the kid and you had to punk him out like that. It’s a contact sport, dude, and his contact (from what I can see in this clip) was all legal. It would have taken you far less time and energy to just walk away, but now this will probably cost you a lot. I just hope you learn from this and move on.

Well, that’s hilarious. Seriously, that ball took a hop worse than RBNY’s Danny Cepero‘s, so I really think we can stop focusing on this “once in a lifetime” thing. Poor keeper, though.

Yeah, I am going to watch the World Cup in 3D, I think. From my home. Where I don’t fear BEING KILLED. [Image via Dirty Tackle]

Sounds preposterous, right? Well, you would be dead wrong.

German goalie Jens Lehman really needed a potty break during Stuttgart’s Champions League match with Unirea Urziceni on Wednesday night.

So he ducked behind some advertising boards and went to the bathroom right in the middle of the match, which they won 3-1. [via]

Guess you could say that they opponents scared the piss out him. Hahahahahah ha.

…

I had to do that once, but it was in college and there were no boards. Embarrassing story.

The World Cup 2010 Match Ball, the Jabulani. Best part about this one: the only way that Jon Conway ever gets his hands on one is to purchase it.

Eff that guy.

Translated literally, “JABULANI” means “to celebrate.” I will be celebrating our awesome World Cup draw tonight, that’s for sure.

Press release and quotes from Kaka, Frank Lampard and more “after the jump” (more…)