…the Dutch been here for years. Giovanni van Bronckhorst may have hit a screamer against Uruguay in the World Cup semifinals, but it wasn’t his first. Hell, it wasn’t even his first from THAT EXACT SPOT.

At least I didn’t do it this time, right? Bad officiating, but it’s been an exciting cup so far.

I won’t post this clip on the front page as it is GRAPHIC, but check it out “after the jump”

Cute. Clever. Funny.

I still hate him, though.

Getty Images for Red Bull New York

After a string of losses and a sudden inability to create anything substantial offensively, Red Bull New York rebounded yesterday with a 3-1 win over Italian Serie A great, Juventus. Granted, according to David Trezeguet, “these matches count for little,” it was still a great day of soccer from both the Italian side and our own Bulls (who I only call the “Pink Cows” when they can’t seem to effing score or play like arse).

Greg Sutton was solid in goal, making the saves required of him and despite the late Amauri goal, he was pretty good. We’ll obviously be seeing him again on Wednesday in the US Open Cup match against Colorado, so hopefully the team we fielded Sunday will be back in front of him.

While Conor Chinn was Man of the Match, it should be noted that Irvinho (you people can call him Irving Garcia, but this kid is a beast!), played another bonkers game. He’s earned some starts in league play and maybe bringing Dane Richards off the bench as a super sub might be the boost we need right now.

Photo: Getty Images via MLS

It’s tough watching the team struggle like they are. I used to find a way to blame Jon Conway, but right now, we’re very offensively stagnant and/or unlucky. Despite having the majority of possession, we aren’t attacking very well and are allowing the opposing teams to fall back into a defensive shell. It’s ugly footie, frankly. Last night’s 3-1 loss only highlights exactly what is wrong with the team: without creative people feeding Angel the ball (Lindpere and Nielsen were both out) we are pretty much a “bang it long and hope someone flicks it on goal” sort of team.

That or we flick it in. Like Salou or, last night, Tony Tchani.

Can Dane develop a “football mind?” I have no idea. Where’s Jozy when you need him? Thierry Henry might help, but the worst result from last night should have been a draw. That we also BLED three goals defensively (one 5 minutes after “Team Glidden” first scored and the clincher just after we had pulled one back), shows how little composure we have defensively. That’s not a skill issue. Someone needs to step up.

Allow me to say “eff”. Glad I didn’t put money on my Spain-Germany Final prediction.

Michael Ballack, midfielder for Chelsea and Germany captain, will miss the upcoming 2010 FIFA World Cup due to an ankle injury. He suffered the injury in the English FA Cup final on Saturday, May 15, 2010 after a tackle from Kevin-Prince Boateng. Ballack has played in several World Cups and was expected to be a major part of the German squad in the midfield. Below is the official statement from the German Football Association (DFB).

The tomogram showed a torn interior ligament and a partial rupture of the syndesmosis ligament of his right ankle, which for the time being will have to be immobilized and put in a cast. Ballack will then wear a specially designed shoe for two weeks. German team doctor Hans-Wilhelm Müller-Wohlfahrt said, that according to today’s diagnosis, Ballack can look forward to a complete recovery, but that a minimum eight weeks will be required before the German skipper may consider returning to regular training.

Well, since that screws up a ton of stuff. To make me feel better, here’s footage of the coolest dive ever by Jurgen Klinsmann from the 1990 World Cup:

Check out the “making of” “after the jump”

[h/t BuzzFeed]

Well, it’s Friday, people. Tomorrow’s “Meet the Team” Day and we WON’T have to meet Jon Conway for the first time in years. In honor of that occasion, I found something great from our friends at The Sporting Blog: an ultra-rare “tandem” bicycle kick.

Sebastian Romero and Marco Perez activated their Wonder Twin powers to combine on what might be the first and only tandem bicycle kick goal in the history of the world. At least in actual competition. I can see it being staged in someone’s backyard. The two Gimnasia La Plata players had the serendipitous pairing of kicks after the ball deflected off a Boca Juniors defender in an Argentina Primera Division match last Sunday. [I Believe That's What Is Called a Tandem Bicycle Kick]

Yeah, that’s pretty awesome. The commercials that play AFTER the highlights are pretty great too. I learned how to move my body. Cool beans?

I won’t sit here and say that I haven’t lost my cool during a soccer match before (that would be a total lie), but there’s no excuse for this level of aggression. In this clip, Arlington Shirley of North West Rankin High (Ms) is just pummeled (and not in a good way at all) by Zach Windom of Gulfport High (Ms).

I feel bad for Zach’s teammates as they really were impacted by his bad choice and he should, really, be forced to the sidelines for the rest of the year. You just can’t do stuff like that, if you let it happen in sports under the guise of “aggression,” you’re sugar coating some serious anger issues. They’re right there to see.

Zach, man, you’re bigger than the kid, you’re probably stronger than the kid and you had to punk him out like that. It’s a contact sport, dude, and his contact (from what I can see in this clip) was all legal. It would have taken you far less time and energy to just walk away, but now this will probably cost you a lot. I just hope you learn from this and move on.